I truly enjoy writing articles/blogs about relationships and interactions.
*Please keep in mind, my postings of the ‘Relationships & Life’ category are my own personal musings/rantings/sharings, not directed personally, but just on and about observations of the world at large. (The prequel to this writing today –> http://moonshaman.wordpress.com/2011/11/19/im-happy-let-it-be/ )
Firstly, I wish to express gratitude for the womyn friends right now, around and about me and the amazing essence each one does radiate. Each weaving their own Gorgeous Path, Painting their own canvas, and Enjoying exactly where they’re at, ups and downs, ever being present, ever evolving, in each moment.
Some pics of beauty & fun ~~ Just to depict a few womyn of & in my life ….
Strong, intuitive, smart, beautiful, lovely, awesome women!!!
We keep on Truckin’ and hold down the proverbial fort, in this World.
Through the years, I’ve noticed– Some people along the way will ask what things I may do to change my current state of Being. Why change my current state of Being? I’m truckin’ along. I’m ok. I’m happy where I’m at.
So….regarding some the inquiries….
Questions may include:
When will you get pregnant?
When when you find your soulmate/husband?
When will you move? Will you move to California, with thee other hippies? Are you going to relocate out of the country-side? Outta the Country-itself?! To the MOOOOOON!
Will you work full-time as a psychic?
When will you buy a house?
Will you erect a lil dolmen mound and dwell underground in it, on the Irish moors?
When will you adopt a goat, I know you love ‘em so much!?
Will you live on a farm?
Have you thought about what a tattoo will look like in old age?!
Very pushy, presumptuous and also quite hot button issues, in question, much of the time. If you ask any of these questions in hounding/anxious fashion to your daughters, relatives and friends. Please, please… keep your ponderings, to your journal, ok? Stop buuuuuuggin’ folks! And if you’re getting these questions… I hope my writing today can be a cathartic release for you. When we get these questions, do you notice, all the while, there’s an underlying ’well-meaning-ness’?? This is somewhat phantasmal & lurking about. I just can’t quite put my finger on it!
Along thse lines, also, there may be times, I was sharing about a topic or a situation of which I was working through. Sharing deeply about touch-y topics may provoke questions like thee above, from some people. The ‘fix it immediately’ mentality finds this to be opportune & rears up with a barrage of questions. Questions like the ones above– PLUS, to boot, statements chock full of solutions. These solutions, not particularly asked for or welcomed with open arms, could have been put aside and left quietly to oneself. Through these many moons, I’ve learned to be more discerning and private, now, about whom with and where that I share my personal goals & challenges, endeavors, & dreams. In turn, overall, I don’t need to rap about it everywhere…I can just declare here, very simply — I’m happy where I’m at. : ….And Thus, my deep responses, RESOUNDING, through the land…to the questions above …
- I’m JUST BEING.
- I’m working through it, at my pace.
- I don’t desire, TAT TALL, of what you’re asking of me.
- I dont agree with what you’re saying, TAT TALL.
- I just wanted someone to HEAR and listen about where I was at. No Solutions. Just hear me.
- I’m not quite ready for that yet, for a variety of reasons.
It’s ok to be in the thick of it, feel it & be with it. This too shall pass. In our society, a ’pop a pill and make it go away, real fast’ world…. This, not allowing self-reflection, not allowing time to just be and also not allowing healing of the root cause issues prevents the un-tanglement the habit energy. Our silence and holding space for someone, thus, does assist for deep healing, preventing a constant reoccurrence of a habit energy. This is why I keep a box of tissues in near reach for clients, in my office…as to that, I do not hand a tissue to a client when tears come. This allows clients to opt to get as slobbery & tearful as they’d like, and help themselves to a tissue, at their own rate. Let the release flow….
Another good example of this, is that– Today a good friend posted a status which read, “I think sometimes people forget there’s a difference between being angry and being an angry person. It then becomes taboo to be angry, at all, ever. Anger is a very natural emotion. Expressed in healthy ways, it flushes out of your system. No problem.
The stigma around anger is silly. You shouldn’t fear forever being thought as The Angry Man if you yell “dammit!” over too-hot coffee, one day. After all, if you have coffee today, you don’t expect to forever be thought as The Coffee Man. Right?”
Sometimes, do we walk around, being conditioned? Do we suppress ourselves around certain others or places, to be on the ‘safe side’ to avoid ‘trouble’ or ‘bullshiite’??
Do we get annoyed when one tries to label us, simply from a fleeting moment?
Do we just wanna be left in peace to release and then, to go back to homeostasis? YES YES YES! I think, the issue at hand is that we just have a ‘quick to judge’, knee-jerk culture/society. (In the substance addiction Recovery world, we call this archetypal-ness: ‘King Baby.’ <~~”I want it my way and I want it fast. My way’s the only way. I’m on the only one existing on this three dimensional plane. I’m always right. Fuck your needs. I’m a big ol’ baba.”)
Let us make a go of allowing our friends, loved ones and clients to be where they are at. Either: Angry, Uber slap-happy, making seemingly dumb decisions, indecisive, at peace with a decision, overly loving without wisdom, co-dependent, cultivating wisdom through trial and error, distorted, PMS-y, irritable. And let us recognize that this is our perception of the other person. Our view may not be fact, — I mean, we could be so entirely off base and it doesn’t mean what is happening before your eyes is carved in stone forever, for this person. We’re ever-expanding and contracting ~ & repeat … We’re breathing, in motion, & we’re ALIVE! Judgment can safely be removed from this type of equation.
Perhaps, if we’re moved to, let’s find an appropriate/timely way to ask our friends/loved ones/clients, ”Would you like to hear an intuitive suggestion, an idea, some advice?”– Before we go running on about it. We might hear, “I’m cool where I’m at. Thanks.”
I’m not trying to harshly criticize folks or even myself of where the mind is at and for asking evocative questions, all while mostly ’meaning well.’ However, keep in mind, if we are holding a distortion of thought/feeling that, “This person in front of me needs to change because I’m sure they are not happy where they are at…” The person at the receiving end feels the vibe that we’re holding inside, in one sense or another. We’re living in a time of transparency. We’re living in a time where it’s so important to be holding space in Solidity for our fellow people.
So, we certainly do not have to take projection personally, but in an ideal world– we shouldn’t have to take it at all.
Let’s work to put an end to Projection today, hey!
Today, I’m putting this out into the ether– to no one specific at this time…. and for myself as a reminder to not try to shake people awake into awakened nature. ;-)
But, for a final rant….For the Love of all that is Divine… All you wondrous womyn who are with me, share this, comment about it…. This goes out to those whom: *ahem*….–>Especially, If you(‘ve been) finding yourself ask(ing) your daughters, sisters, female relatives and friends when will they have a baby/ a husband~~ Please cease and desist. NOBODY, in any scenerio LIKES to be HARRASSED with this type of question. If somebody shared this blog with you today, and you DO ask this kind of question(s), the sharing individual is trying to kindly ask you to STOP asking these kind of questions. The kinda question about babies and marriage is the coup de grâce of ‘em all. Ok, if we really were able and wanted to have either of those two things or ANY the things mentioned above, for that matter– we’d be doing/have it all, by now. Do you realize?
I stand up to this, I stand up to society and the ‘norms’ and claim…
I’m happy where I’m at.
Gratitude for ~what is~ WITHIN me…
~Aho! Mitakuye Oyasin~
Me … in a time of pure bliss . One very Green & ALIVE, Summer day…
Happy where I was ~ Happy where I’m at … Happy where I’ll be……